teddy heaven

Flying Teddy Bear by Joigauti from Flickr - I searched for 'Teddy Heaven'

Last week I said goodbye to my childhood teddy, and yes, I'll confess, had a little cry.

This teddy (named Teddy, duh) originally belonged to my Mum, given to her by a beloved uncle when she was just a itty bitty thing. Post war years he (Teddy) was quite an extravagance, and he wasn't a small guy either - in the pic I'm about 3 months old so you can see the size of him.

Teddy endured the attentions of my Mum, her younger brother, myself and my two younger brothers and had long ago lost his glossy coat and, in circumstances which I can't remember, all the stuffing in one of his arms. For a number of years he wore a tiny baby mitten on the damaged appendage...

He wasn't a particularly cuddly bear (they made them quite rigid and tough in 1945), but I loved his firm stoacism and his comforting heavy presence on my bed. I shed many a tear onto his coarse fur, and have one particular memory of punching him when I was angry at something/one else and then being overcome with regret and sobbing all over him. Poor little bear.

Teddy has lived in a box for many years now, too fragile & dusty to be played with, and when I discovered last week that he'd befriended a colony of fish-moths (can't really blame him, the poor guy didn't have very many options), I made the tough decision that it was time for him to shuffle off to teddy heaven.

On rubbish day I lovingly carried his box out to our wheelie bin, and gently laid it on the top of the rubbish inside, hoping the rubbish truck would come soon. A while later I looked out the window and was distressed to see one of our regular rubbish bergies rifling through the bin. I knew he'd be after cardboard and was horrified to think I might see him wrench Teddy out of his box and chuck him back into the bin on top of the rubbish (for the full horror of this please remember I've a nappy-wearing child in the house, I don't think I need to elaborate....), but I couldn't look away.

And so imagine how touched I was to see this guy open the box, and then just stare down at my beloved bear for a moment, fold the box closed again and place him ever so gently back into the bin. And that's when I had a little cry.

Bye bye Teddy, thanks for all the love and companionship you funny old bear.