Like, omg a baby (or two) could fall out of that woman any moment now, look away, look away.
I went to a couple of shops this afternoon and it's possibly the first time since I've been clearly and visibly pregnant (not just possibly 'big boned') that no one's engaged with me about it. No questions about when I'm due or what I'm expecting or 'Baby sure likes these sausage rolls hey' when I go back to buy another batch less than 15 minutes after the first (and btw, to that lady: watch it).
It's not that I mind the lack of engagement. Truthfully it's somewhat of a relief after months of being inanely polite, but I think the size of my belly is starting to make people nervous.
My hairdresser last week as I was paying my bill and leaving said, 'Shew, glad you made it through your appointment without anything happening', the doorman at the bank says goodbye with undisguised relief that I've not sullied their vile green carpets on his shift. People in check-out queues avoid my eye, but can't help glancing a second or third time at my belly.
Maybe this is why we used to go into confinement. To save the rest of the world from being exposed to our blatant fecund over-ripeness. Maybe this far along a pregnant woman becomes a little obscene. A little too 'Ja I had sex, yup someone planted their seed inside me, hell yeah I might actually push another human being out of my vajayjay in the near future'.
Am I making you uncomfortable? Trust me darlin' not nearly as uncomfortable as I am.