Friday, September 23, 2011

hello f%!@ cupboard

A teacher I know tells the best story of how one day in her classroom, exasperated beyond by her class of small people, she stuck her head in a cupboard, pulled the doors closed around her ears and said quietly; 'FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.'

Then she came out the cupboard and continued patiently and pleasantly teaching her class.

This blog is now that cupboard.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I needed that. I just can't do that over there. There were I'm spending a lot of time, riding a roller coaster of emotional highs and lows, technical exasperation's, personal disappointments and growing excitement.

So I'm coming here to download:

Writing for a wide and varied audience is hard.
Trying to keep true to my style and my tone without offending people is hard.
Who are these people I think I'm not supposed to offend?
Over 1500 page views but under 50 followers can make a girl doubt herself.
Starting a new blog is so much less about writing than I'd realised.
Technical stuff is necessary, and time-consuming.
Fuck facebook for launching their new format THIS week.
Fuck facebook 'friends' for whom one does favours but then can't even be bothered to visit or like my new page.
Actually fuck facebook in general, I'm so over it.
Also Feedburner, fuck them.
Despite all this I'm so enjoying having a project, and I am loving the writing ... but,
... I'm writing a parenting blog and this week I spent most of my time trying to escape from my kiddies to do so.
I like me some irony.

Shrug shoulders, shake out hair, deep breath.
I feel much better now.

Thank you first-love-blog, I won't abuse you like this again I promise.


Laoch of Chicago said...

It is hard to do multiple things well at the same time. Also it is hard if you have mixed goals.

LaurenLolo{me}LaurieLoLC said...

I, for one, appreciate venting and I am not offended. Sometimes you just need to get it out! You fucking go girl!!!

spudballoo said...

I used to put my head in the fridge and siliently scream FUCKING SHUT UP at my boys when they were younger. I haven't done that for a while, guess they get easier as they grow older. Just as well as our new place has an under counter fridge, so it would involve kneeling on the floor to get my head in it for the FUCK silent screaming. Ridiculous.

I am with you on the mummy blogger thing. I found myself kind of sucked in to it in the UK. I have met some great people, I love a few of the blogs and I really enjoy chattering to them on Twitter. But 99% of the blogs are boring. Seriously dull. It amazes me that they are so famous etc as 'top mummy bloggers' when they write constant boring crap.

And yes, all the techie facebook SEO stuff so an utter arse.

Feeling your pain. Wine? x

Anna Bartlett said...

No fucking worries. We hear you.

eggdipdip said...

no wucking furries mate. Spudballoo is right and has just voiced something that I'd been afraid to admit. I thought I was missing something and couldn't understand why these bland blogs that are really just PR machines were so popular. meh. fuck them.

Molly said...

@Laoch - 'mixed goals' zapped me with a light bulb moment. I need to clarify my goals for myself on this one. Thank you!
And thank you SO much everyone else for the support!
@Spud I LOVE that story :) and will you all promise to let me know the second I start sounding like a boring mummy-blogger? Puhlees.
Have a fucking great weekend.

Indiri @ Turning Stones said...

I'm mostly a craft blogger at heart but I wasn't true to that on my blog because I was trying to make sure everyone was happy. Except then *I* wasn't. I started blogging it the way I wanted it to be and figured that the right type of people would follow (and the wrong ones would leave). I lost several followers and almost lost my confidence but I have more now than I did then AND I have the blog I wanted.

I realize this is a lot of talking about me (sorry about that!) but the point is that if you can stop caring about the follower count and just make a blog that *you* would want to read, then it all seems to just magically work in very surprising ways. Sorry about the new blog hiccups but just remember that they are only that: hiccups.

And where is that facebook page? I don't see a link from the blog?

janice said...

I enjoy reading this blog. It is one of the first ones I followed. I like the realness of it.

julochka said...

i like this, i like it a lot. i was thinking you'd maybe abandon this space, but i think it's where the real you is...that said, you sound like you over there too. i think you shouldn't worry about being edgy there. edgy is good.

Molly said...

Thank you Janice, that means a lot.