2017 is going to be YUGE

2017 is going to be hard. Challenging and scary and exhausting.
2017 will require us all to 'nut-up' (my very most worst and best expression of late).
We know this.

But there are things so much bigger than all that.

There are big skies and adventures.

Big open beaches and friendships big enough to hold all our collective memories.

Big moments of peace and remembrance, big emotions and spaces to hold them.

Big acts of nature to remind us of a power greater than ours, to give us bigger perspectives on all we hold dear.

And big love. Always big love.

2017 will have all of these - and they will make easier to bear, no matter what comes our way. Let's keep our eyes on the big picture, it's a lovely one.

25 things about right now.

1. I spend all my days logged into the Other Google Account.
2. The one with The Work and The Questions and The People who need me all the time.
3. My life could not be more different to this time last year.
4. As the conference I'm working on draws near (9-13 Feb), I'm feeling The Thrill. It's a good feeling.
5. I'm working with such a diverse group of people.
6. And seriously have to watch my foul potty mouth - probably not a bad thing ...
7. Also, I was in a meeting this week with 5 other people who were all 5 - 10 years younger than me.
8. Just, wow.
9. RETRACTED
10. Unrelated: if I want to send a Glitter Bomb I need only sweep my study (aka the Art Room) floor.

11. A Glitter & Dog Hair Bomb that is.
12. Seriously, our dogs have the worst life.

13. And on the subject of Lego, there's been a bit of building around here - it's a great work distraction.

(I only noticed the cat/eye thing when I downloaded this.)

14. LEGO building is also fun by lamplight, during load-shedding, which is back.

15. I'm extremely lucky to have a LEGO Fairy Godmother. She's been keeping us in steady supply.
16. Oh wait, there's more LEGO...
17. Somebody has started meticulously planning her birthday party in March.

18. These are all the items which will appear on her cake .... apparently.
19. Not pictured: a fluffy leopard (which I said would have to stand alongside because icing) and a ninja (because invisible).
20. I sense I'm going to have to relinquish control over this one. And that's okay.
21. There's nothing wrong with a LEGO-Leopard-Dinosaur-Ninja 5th Birthday Party at all. We welcome diversity in this house.
22. My brother and sister-in-law are moving into their new house (much closer to us - yay!) RIGHT NOW. We're standing by with supper ...
23. My other brother is getting married NEXT MONTH!
24. Family for the win.
25. Now what the hell am I going to wear for 5 days of formal conferencing??

books: 2014

Slipping in just ahead of the new year - my reading list for 2014!

I'm so pleased with myself for sticking with this since last year, and for updating and completing it in time for 2015 ... less pleased that it's been in drafts for months but hey ... it's been a busy year!

Fewer books than 2013 but none-the-less, I'm pleased with myself and spent the year in some very fine company indeed.

Ah reading, where would I be without you?

50 things about right now

1. We sold my car on Saturday. I'd had it since 2006.
2. It felt like the last vestige of my pre-kids life driving away.
3. Stella's favourite word(s) are 'spic and span'.
4. Frieda's favourite word is 'lunch'. Say them out loud, they're awesome.
5. My favourite word is any one which is not directed at me.
6. This week I see a biokineticist.
7. I'm still not sure how they differ from a physiotherapist.
8. This week we see Stella's ENT. Again.
9. I will be fucking annoyed if we're going back for more grommets.
10. Someone suggested sacro cranial massage instead. Is that really a thing?
11. This week I start my collage class. Have I mentioned I'm excited?
12. This week is going to be super busy.
13. We're hosting a mermaid pirate birthday party on Saturday.
14. The lounge is half-painted.
15. I need to 1) bake 24 cupcakes (done!),
16. 2) bake 16 mini-cupcakes (fuckit, I'm buying un-iced ones),
17. 3) make icing in 3 different colours. This is all just for the cake.
18. The cake is going to be goddamn beautiful.
19. The girls and I made octo-pops (pics to follow) (not cake pops)
20. Stella didn't feel the 'tentacles' (her word) were anatomically correct.
21. We're reading On the Banks of Plum Creek.
22. We're reading Pegasus.
23. Frieda's reading flash cards. Frieda's reading.
24. We got the pedalo back in the water (husband's been repairing it) and he and Frieda took it for a spin.
25. He happily reports her legs have grown enough to significantly help with pedaling.
26. A dehydrated duckling quietly died in front of us on Friday. There's been lots of talk of death.
27. I'm having a bit of a 'approaching 40 and facing the limitations of my body' moment. Despite 40 still being 14 months away.
28. I'm tired of it not working properly though. My body that is.
29. The battery on my mobile is stuffed. I'm ignoring it.
30. And on the subject, our ginger cat is getting on and I'm nervous about how she'll handle winter.
31. Winter is coming.
32. Luckily so is series 4.
33. Husband is going to make scones for the parents on Saturday. He's a keeper.
34. I'm wondering if I can be arsed to make pirate flags ... if I do they'll be black skulls on white backgrounds 'cos that's all the fabric I have. Is that acceptable? Aha! Friends arrived with their kid draped in one, he very kindly let us borrow it for the weekend.
35. How many parents will come, and stay, on Saturday?
36. How far in advance can one make jelly?
37. I want to start working raised beds this autumn to plant veggies for spring.
38. Must do some research ...
39. I don't often indulge parenting-related guilt, but after many weeks of being disconnected (my ankle injury and then working so hard the last two), I feel I need to put some thought and planning in to what we'll do with our time together (the girls and I) this year.
40. Spending time with them is so good.
41. Their relationship with each other fascinates me.
42. Frieda has way more patience with her sister than I do.
43. The best thing about prepping for a party is clearing out all the junk in the house.
44. We took a full load to the dump on the weekend.
45. Why are we such hoarders?
46. Is there anything better than finding the perfect use for something you've been hoarding?
47. I really should be coating marshmallows in chocolate.
48. Or figuring out whether it's best to receive $$ straight into my bank account or through PayPal.
49. I should write about the American Job, for therapy as much as anything else.
50. Instead I'm hanging strings of stars arbitrarily around the house.

My little star turns 4 this month!

ho hum ... grateful ...

I don't make resolutions - 'cos they're naff - but two things I'd like to do more of this year is take random pictures of shadows and textures and such, and send interesting packages to interesting places.
All of you who live in interesting places take heed.

My sister-in-law is the care package queen and I find it highly enviable. Also, I have latent guilt from friends and family living abroad for many years and receiving very little actual post from me.
I'm starting with a sick boy I know of far away ... let's see how well I pull this off.

Two weeks tomorrow, still on crutches. Photos taken: 0 (besides the obligatory first day of school snaps). Care packages sent: 0. Getting off to a good start ...

But, I am grateful for ...

~ rediscovering the joy of a bath, in my able-bodied life I'd shunned baths in favour of the more efficient seeming shower
~ netflix - because when you really need to kill time, there's no better way
~ my smartphone and how it has entertained me when the effort of fetching my book from the next room is not worth the pain, or awkward under-the-arm-tenuous-crutch-grip-slash-risk-of-another-injury
~ the kilo's shed (or more truthfully, not gained) as I'm unable to snack indiscriminately (see: reasons above)
~ that I work from home!

But mostly of course I am consumed with gratitude to my husband, my mum, my fabulous kids, extended family and friends - for assisting and supporting and sympathising.

It's only a sprain, a few weeks on crutches is, as my father would say, but nothing against the limitless span of eternity, but it's been interesting. More thoughts on that soon.

a few of my favourite things

Julie did this today, much more artfully and better lit than me, but I had to play along so did a quick whip around the house with my camera before we lost all light (it's an unseasonably grey and rainy day here, 'summer rain' coincidentally being one of my other favourite things ...).

my silver and gold (and some white gold) rings, and some of my adored yellow glass collection

my beloved Shy Girl by Frank van Reenen

my growing Lego minifig collection, inspired again by Julie ... got a couple of gaps to fill yet. Yay!

there are a couple of interlopers in the collection, incl. Mr Frosty - he's awesome

Nguni cattle poster. I adore Nguni's, have I mentioned Husband's promised to buy me one one day?

my Liesel Trautmann ceramics ... I have a growing collection

Tord Boontje Garland, draped around the light on our stairwell

And I haven't even pictured these sneakers or these or this fabulous awesomeness ... I often get despondent that I don't have cash to buy nice things, this was a timely reminder that I already have some very nice things indeed!

they can have it

In So Much for That, a Lionel Shriver novel I recently read, there's a wonderful paragraph towards the end where the main character - his wife is dying, he's lost his job, his life's ambition is slipping away from him - makes a list (I love a list).

'Thank-you notes and surreptitious sponging of gravy stains; heat-crimped packaging that only opened with pruning shears, and incompatible software. Ramadan, Columbus Day, and picnics. National self-determination, recipes for banana bread, and Amazon.com. Bungee-cord jumping, suicide bombing, and falling in love. Space stations, purdah, and male pattern baldness. Right-to-life protests, self-defrosting refrigerators, and hemlines; Christmas-tree air-fresheners, presidential assassinations, and ten-year retrospectives on the fall of apartheid. Micro-lending, woodworm treatments, and anti-vivisection leagues. West Bank settlements and genetically modified cron; nuclear antoproliferation states, National Salt Awareness Week, and fluoridated water. Narco states, dust ruffles, and bus shelter vandalism; lucky numbers, favourite colours, and button collections. Tribal scarring and Polka Album of the Year Awards, tea ceremonies, buzz cuts, and alternative energy. Feature films, the Fifth Amendment, and weather forecasts; Arctic exploration, affirmative action, and cell phone contracts. The South Beach Diet, elder abuse, and the Battle of Waterloo; burkhas, bedsteads, and the designated hitter rule; heirlooms, insoles, and the European Union. From IEDs, GDPs, and MP3s to Gore-Tex, gas shortages, and gardening tips; he was sick of it, man. Of people and their shit.'

What I wouldn't give to be able to write like that.

lists of 5: 5 reasons I'm already feeling better.

- a big weep, a couple actually
- yoga this morning
- her 3 hour nap
- smoked salmon for dinner
and most preciously,
- so much warmth, love and support from friends far and near ... thank you.

These are the things which have me feeling better today.

I promise I'm only going to do this once ...

... because a list this good deserves to be, um, listed.

Our new house has:

- a walk-in safe, complete with 3 ton door and combination lock (although no one knows the combination...)
- a semi-precious rock garden, with great hunks of Jasper, Amethyst, Rose Quartz, Crystal and more
- a dressing room, just for me
- an under-the-stairs wine cellar
- a double-garage and outside work room (which currently smells really bad, but it's there right?)
- a laundry room
- a tool shed
- a (falling apart) jetty
- a small sail boat with all accessories barring (ahem), a mast
- a frangi-pani tree ('cos it's not a home without one)
- a secret attic room (I know!)
- an internal staircase perfect for wild games involving a giant Pilates ball and two little girls
- an external staircase perfect for playing Rapunzel
- a mud room
- a stoep with a view so breath-taking it soothes away the most stressful of days
- a lake, though I may have mentioned that?
- a fairy garden
- a zillion built-in-cupboards
- a bay window for basking
and, if you don't hate me already ...
- an art room (though husband prefers to call it a studio), for all manner of glitter-fuckery and creative pursuits

Many (most) of these are in various states of disrepair and decrepitude. Many of these were unknown to us on purchase. Many (most) of these seem to come straight from a long-held childhood fantasy of living in a ramshackle double-story house with hidden nooks and crannies.
All of these are why I feel like the luckiest girl alive and think we may just live here forever.

And ever and ever and ever.

35 things ...

... I've learnt, pondered or realised since turning 35. It's been a busy few days.

1. When your life requires you to always carry wet wipes you can eat sticky buffalo chicken wings while driving.

2. Bull terriers are so named as they were used to bait bulls. This explains why they're often so !#%*ing irritating.

But not why they're sometimes so beautiful, would the bulls notice?

3. What's the point of 'easy-peel' lemons? Who ever peels a lemon?

4. It is possible to be too prepared. I thought I was so clever weighing out the dry ingredients for my birthday cake a week in advance and storing them in a ziploc (probably ^TM) bag until I was ready to bake. Turns out combining the baking powder and flour so early on meant the cake didn't rise as it should have. Still tasted damn good though.

5. I've been reading Richard Kelly's biography of Sean Penn and finding it fascinating. Penn's theory of the Chinese Lines of friendship is inspired.

6. It is possible to catch a fish, in a bush, 5 km away from the ocean. As demonstrated by our dog who pulled a dried and stinking, but sizable, fish out of a bush while we were out walking. Weird.

7. At this stage in my life inviting 4 girlfriends over for birthday tea and cake produces a crowd of no less than 9 children (including my own).

8. Making up a batch of cupcakes and providing different colour icing and some sprinkles is a most excellent way of keeping some of the above mentioned kids entertained.

9. It's dumb to visit a bird sanctuary without remembering to take binoculars.

10. Red wine stains on the baby blanket is not such a good look.

11. Yellow food colouring is the most persistent. I'm considering soaking my thumb in bleach for a few minutes.

12. If I had a suitable hiding place I'd seriously consider stashing all the tools etc my husband leaves lying around and then enjoy watching his mounting panic when he thinks he's lost them.

13. He'd be welcome to do the same for me.

14. Watching your children wrestle their own demons is very hard. Whether it's your 10 week old with a nasty cough (Yup, she's got it now. Of course), or your nearly-3 yr old battling her inner turmoil at the uncertainty of growing up, its painful to witness.

15. People are s-t-r-a-n-g-e.

16. Its fun to be on facebook over your birthday.

17. I miss my iPod, I don't get a lot of time to plug in when I'm perpetually keeping an ear open for the baby. I also think it would be oddly impolite to listen to it while breast-feeding - am I over-sensitive?

18. My mother is a SAINT.

19. You can take a nearly-3 yr old to water, but you can't keep her dry.

20. The approaching 5 week school holidays (stupid soccer world cup) fills me with fear and dread. My solution is to event-coordinate the fuck out of it. Frieda won't know what hit her.

21. Toes. I love them.

22. It's good to explore new places.

23. It's as good to revisit the places you've been.

24. Memories from student days turn out to be a little hazy in patches ...

25. One can spend a whole afternoon persuading a slightly constipated and nervous pre-schooler to Have a Poo. Fun times.

26. The tumble-dryer is rapidly replacing the dishwasher in my affections.

27. It's round about no. 27 that one can start regretting the whole 'list of 35 things' concept. 35?!

28. Maybe now that I'm 35 I should do proper research on the appropriate use of 'one' and 'you' and then stick to some kind of uniformity?

29. Ditto the use of colons and semi-colons. I've had it explained to me a zillion times. You know I'm an English Major right? Got a class medal and everything ...

30. Baby wetsuits. Now there's a bright idea (soon to be^TM ).You suit 'em up at bedtime, they're easy-wipe and fully sealed. Should see you through the spills and thrills of even the worst nights.
You read it here first.

31. I found my birthday card from my Granny in the bushes under the postbox, the envelope half-eaten by snails and curiously lumpy. Fearing worms, soil or worse I opened it cautiously over the rubbish bin. Turns out it was one of those that makes a sound when you open it, a very tasteful Tawny Owl hoot (she's a tasteful gal my Gran). I love it, Frieda's intrigued by it and Lego the dog thinks its a monster from the very bowels of hell and must be destroyed! destroyed! omfg!

32. I'm working on a facebook photo album in which I plan to post photos of, and tag, as many of my facebook 'friends' as possible. I've been trawling our photo archives and have found some beauts. I'm kinda toying with the idea of then 'de-friending' anyone who I don't have a photo of, but I already know I won't do that.

33. I may be 35 but I'm still not above forcing Frieda to pause Postman Pat when I have to answer the phone. It was an episode I'd not seen before ok?

34. I'm thinking about home-schooling. Omg no, not actually doing it, just thinking about the concept and how possibly nuts you'd have to be to do it.

35. Turns out I've been mis-spelling 'surprise' my whole life. Suprise!

some simple things

I'm playing along with Christina's Simple Things challenge. For every blog post celebrating a simple thing or things today, her family is donating $1 to Medecins Sans Frontieres, as support for their relief efforts in Haiti.

And although I could hold a wee selfish and shallow grudge against them, I won't. Of course.

Because forgiveness is a simple thing.

As is ...

... discovering a daddy crush when dropping your daughter off at playschool and henceforth having something to look forward to on the school run ...

... booking 4 days away in a river cottage - we go next week!

... spending the afternoon in a beautiful place with a beautiful person ...

... being reminded of a previous visit there, and reflecting on how much changes in 6 months ...

... fighting waves of nostalgia (is it nostalgia?) as I think how these afternoons of just the two of us will soon be over ...

7 random things & a bunch of pics

It's obviously meme season here in the blogosphere, I got tagged for another one by McGillicutty (confession: I cut 'n pasted her name from her blog 'cos I knew I'd spell it wrong otherwise ... ), in which I must share 7 random things about myself, and a picture (or many). And I love random. So here goes ...

1. My biggest vanity are my feet.

I've been wearing the rings since 1998.
They're heavy silver, made by one of my best friends
and given to me by my beloved Husband
(then the beloved Squeeze ... ).

2. I once followed a really bad BMW driver into KFC and berated him in front of everyone in the queue for driving like a c*nt. Then I turned on my heel and marched out to my vintage Beetle praying to all the gods of Cool that she'd uncharacteristically start for the first time. She did.

3. My proudest recent achievements have been persuading my picky-eater daughter to eat dry All-Bran Flakes by calling them ... wait for it ... Breakfast Chips. Sheer brilliance.
I also, after 7 nights in a row of her eating pesto on spaghetti (and only if we called the pasta noodles), beat her at her own game and duped her into eating risotto by calling it 'little tiny noodles' (to be said in a cutesy-pie voice). She wolfed it down. Go Parents!

4. I judge people by their hands. Not like I have standards of hygiene or anything, just that I kind of know whether I'll like someone or not by their hands. I have definite 'types' of hand which I dislike, or that I make (sub)conscious judgements about. Very occasionally I'm surprised to find that someone I really like has hands on The List. This almost makes me like them more.

5. I could eat curry & roti every. single. day. I've always been a fan but when I was pregnant I developed a serious addiction. I ate a particularly good veg curry with roti just before going to the hospital to have Frieda, I called Husband and asked him to bring one home for me after my waters broke and I knew we were in for a long night. Luckily I married a man who makes a mean curry ...

6. I've recently gained far too much self-righteous satisfaction from blatantly spying on someone on Facebook. Nothing unethical, but privacy settings exist- if someone's too stupid to activate them then don't blame me ...

7. We once took part in the Cape Town Aeolian Bike Ride. You've got to see it to believe it.

(http://aeolian-ride.info/) 

I hereby tag the first 3 weeps to read this post. Or something. Thanks McJillyCutie!

5 (random) favourite things meme

Get this: I made up a meme. Yup, all on my lonesome. Why shouldn't I, I thought? Who are these 'gods of memes' who circulate them around the blogosphere? Why shouldn't a mere mortal such as myself start my own one? Ha!

So here it is. Long may it travel.

I've always had the problem of not being able to pick a favourite. I don't have one favourite movie or one favourite book, or one favourite food. Life's just a bit more complex than that for me. I'm 75% Gemini  - go figure.
So the idea here is that you list 5 items in each category, a favourite 5 - but not necessarily in order of favouriteness - to show the diversity/similarity/hilarity/polarity/ or extreme same-ness of your personal likes.

And then tag 5 peeps to do the same. And feel free to add or subtract categories as you like.
Down with meme imperialism!

Herewith the first 5 (Random) Favourite Things Meme:

5 Favourite Songs:
1. Hey Jude - The Beatles
2. We Are Going - Burning Spear
3. Feel Good - Gorillaz
4. Hasta Siempre Comandante Che Gueva - Buena Vista Social Club
5. Gold Digger - Kanye West

5 Favourite Films:
1. Love Actually
2. Room With a View
3. Toy Story
4. Lost in Translation
5. Out of Africa

5 Favourite Books:
1. The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenigger
2. Saturday - Ian McEwan
3. On the Shores of Silver Lake - Laura Ingalls Wilder
4. Love in the Time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
5. Where the Wild Things Are - Maurice Sendak

5 Favourite Crushes:
1. George Clooney
2. Buzz Lightyear
3. Snoop Dogg (saw him in concert, was as surprised as anyone by his total shag-worthiness - who knew?!)
4. Cate Blanchett
5. Benecio del Toro

5 Favourite (Random) Things:
1. Sneakers
2. Post-Its
3. Fridays
4. Curry
5. Giggling

So without further ado, I hereby tag 5 random favourite bloggers:
Extranjera - What Will I Ever Do With My Life?
and just to see if their answers are different ...
Vancouver's Enviro Girl - The (mis)Adventures of Veg
Seaside Girl - Seaside Stories
Spudballoo - Chez Spud
and Superfi 

list of birthday loveliness

In no particular order ~

• sunshine
• hearing the words 'happy birthday mummy' for the first time. ever.
• cupcakes for breakfast
• smoked salmon for lunch
• chocolate birthday cake baked by my husband
• birthday greetings from my 87 yr old grandfather
• not one, but two pairs of Campers (for serious. TWO.)
• not one, but two Liesl Trautmann ceramic bowls
• one most beautiful vintage black filing cabinet with brass trimmings (yup, from here)
• non-stop calls & text messages to make me feel loved
• lots of lovely bloggy greets
• oodles of facebook messages including this, my favourite, from a long-lost childhood friend 'hey babe - happy birthday! hope you get utterly spoilt! the date has been imprinted in my brain since we were 8 - it's great to be able to wish you again!'
• shome very shpectacular wine
• an electric toothbrush (I too shall be dragged into the modern age)
• someone here thinking I turned 26. How sweet! But really... 34!
• the promise of a weekend getaway with my fella and his sexy motorbike
• having supper with my favourite people in all the world, my family
• having truly the most wonderful collection of friends. truly.
• more birthday fun to look forward to
• being so happy it almost hurts

Thank you world!

random tuesdayness

~ managing to brush my teeth and set the washing machine going while cradling a 14kg kiddie swathed in 2 blankets, clutching 2 dollies and a toy panda, makes me feel like a super-hero

~ after years of practise I am now able to drink a cup of hot tea while driving without spilling any on myself but I've yet to work out how to prevent my sunglasses from steaming up [and the sunglasses are non-negotiable so no, wise-asses, 'Don't wear them' is not a acceptable solution]

~ is it uncool to love a homeless person's coat so much you consider offering them 100 bucks for it? Would the more humane approach be to offer them a new (but obviously not as stylish) coat in exchange?

~ today the gods of green traffic lights smiled on me

~ I hate having to carry actual cash, bring on that implanted bar-code thingie in my forehead I say

~ sandwiches cut into little stars really are more appealing to toddlers. This is not just a cutesy-pie myth as I'd long suspected

~ after pondering for some time whether I'd rather eat a hedgehog or a rock, I've decided definitely a rock. All the pain in one mouthful.

~ I love my new shoes

to be perfectly honest...

One of my new blog buddies tagged me for this 'Honest Scrap' meme some time ago. And as I'm feeling much better but still recouping in bed (can I just pause for a moment's acknowledgement of the universal awesomeness of grandparents, who have happily whisked Child away for the day so I can lie about in bed recouping? Here goes ............ . Moment acknowledged, thanks), I thought I'd play along.

So, herewith my list of 10 honest things about myself (and be warned, they're pretty random):

1. I'm feeling a little blasé about this whole swine 'flu hype. I obviously feel really badly for anyone who has it etc, but living in a country where HIV/AIDS is an actual pandemic, we have 3 or 4 strains of multi-drug resistant Tuberculosis on the loose, cholera recently killed thousands of people, we regularly have (admittedly isolated) cases of Ebola virus and malaria is an illness many of us live with every day ... it's a little hard to get my panties in a knot about swine 'flu. Sorry.

2. There's a big bag of mud and cow-shit bespattered shoes outside my backdoor which I still haven't cleaned after that weekend and I don't expect to get round to until, oh, maybe very late the evening before our next camping trip?

3. Having been a committed cat person my whole life I never expected to love our new doggie as much as I do. Dogs win hands down in the unadulterated adoration stakes. That's her adoration - of me. Love it. But also, and you know who I'm talking to here, I still love my kitties the best.

4. I've never wanted to run away and join the circus. I'm a homebody through and through.

5. I'm more nervous of having a 2nd child than I care to admit. I'm completely convinced that we should have one, but the reality scares the bejesus out of me.

6. Sometimes I go to bed without brushing my teeth. I find the minty taste of toothpaste too jarring if it's really late and I'm really tired.

7. I'm so over this renovation thing. Seriously, can we move into a finished, complete, free-flowing family home already?

8. I really enjoy doing laundry. I find it quite satisfying and find it gives me a sense of order. Weird huh.

9. I have a base and compulsive addiction to Survivor and The Amazing Race.

10. I still like to believe I'll have dreadlocks one day - stylish, thin, blond dreadlocks. Just for fun.

I'm supposed to tag seven five fellow bloggers for this one but you know, I'm just too damn lazy! Play along if you'd like tho', and let me know if you have so I can come snooping.

a sensory weekend

smells ~

husband's Chicken Hyderabadi curry (inspired by his recent trip to Pakistan) *the sea *the last of the frangi-pani's, sprinkled with rain

sights ~

my daughter playing with a long-time friend's baby (who'd've thought we'd grow up and be parents??) *great grey banks of cloud and zero-viz sheets of rain *ponies in transit, Africa-style 

sounds ~

the cure*jack johnson*black-eyed peas*led zeppelin*wyclef*madonna*burning spear*the white stripes*red hot chilli peppers*afro-cuban all-stars*bob marley*inxs*ninja tunes*depache mode*brian ferry ~ all courtesy of my iPod on a 2h drive by myself, a rare occurrence

tastes ~

that damn-fine hyderabadi! *granadilla fridge tart *4 cheese muffins with home-made marmalade *pea soup with chorizo and home-baked bread *dark chocolate enrobed nougat ...

(and yes, they are no. 20)

A very splendid weekend, if a little wintery ... 

the deep and meaningful one

I had occasion today to ponder the role of spiritual guru's. 

This is not something I make a habit of by any means. Pondering stuff that is. But today I met a woman of whom much has been said in a number of different friendship circles, a woman who seems to be some kind of spiritual healer, advisor and, from what I can tell, general all-rounder in the field of esoteric um ... anything.

And I found her smug. And self-satisfied. And also, b-o-r-i-n-g. Oh and, she complied with a few too many of my 10 Basic Reasons Not To Like Someone.

no. 4 Ended every sentence with a smile, not a real smile tho' -it never reaches the eyes- just a condescending little 'are you following me?' smile.  ✓

no. 7 Used her hands when speaking in a manner which I find overly dramatic, and therefore pretentious. ✓

and,

no. 10 Annoyed the crap out of me. ✓

And it's not like I'm prejudiced or anything. Noooo, I'm like the least judgemental person you've ever met. No, really ...

Ok, not really. I'm a sceptical, cynical dried-up old hag. Especially when it comes to spiritual guidance. [Please note: not spirituality per se ~ that's a whole other kettle of two fish CGI-ed to feed a multitude ~ today I'm just talking about spiritual leadership.]

I have never been able to shake the feeling that religious or spiritual 'leaders' are almost always entrusted with too much power, too much influence, and too much power too often equals abuse thereof. And smugness. Have I mentioned how much the smugness annoys the f*ck out of me?

Whether it's a sanctimonious Dutch Reform dominee with a perfectly knotted tie and suspiciously clean hands, or a fake lace be-clad ohmming auntie with cool sandals (see? no prejudice from me), it totally frikkin' irks me. No, I don't want to take instruction from you as to how I should feel and conduct myself spiritually. I'm not interested in your interpretation of what's going on 'out there' and what might happen to me if/when I die. I don't really feel like receiving your guidance on how I should handle my relationships.

Is it arrogant to assume I'm qualified to unravel all that alone? With just my context, my experience, my friends, my touch-stones and, er ... my life. I'll risk it.

Maybe when I find one god to believe in I'll be more inclined to listen to it's disciples. For now, I'm just not that into you, guru.

lists of 5: 5 things to get 2009 back on track

Gawd, SO Cape Town... I resolved last Thursday to make this list. I gave myself grace until the new week to start it. Now it's Tuesday...

But, in my defence, I think I lost momentum for it as the items on this particular agenda started resolving and revealing themselves before the list was even written down. Thereby proving that the power of listing lies not with the list, so much as the making of the list - mentally or physically.

It's deep no? 

So here goes:

1. Find a job. ✓(Ok so it's just for March for now, but I have faith more will come of it...)

2. Sort out my studio! Half a ✓(can you guess what fancy new HTML code I learnt recently?) 

3. Up my game. Fitness wise that is. I'm working on it...

4. Focus on quality, not quantity, for my time with Frieda. See yesterday's post...

5. Focus on quantity, not necessarily quality, for my time with husband. We need to just hang out more. I.e. lie on the couch and watch trashy DVD's. Duly scheduled for the weekend.

I already feel so much more relaxed and happy, and the not so astounding truth of the matter is ... because I have work lined up. For all my breezy 'career is just not that important to me' statements, I'm aching to get Stuck Into Something. And next week, I will. Yay!!

no.'s 1 - 4

I have a wonderful friend who constantly delights me with her way of looking at the world. She's very practically minded (a qualified engineer no less), extremely capable and confident in her work, her life, motherhood and most things in general, but I don't think she'd necessarily regard herself as a crafter. However, she loves a good challenge, and she's a master (mistress?) of subtly manipulating the rules of any situation to work for her.

When I told her about Tollipop's 100 craft projects in a year concept, my friend initially scoffed. 'One hundred? About 2 a week? Who has the time?' she exclaimed. But, it seems, I'd planted a seed, for fairly early the next morning she began texting me: [what exactly would count as a 'craft'?], [beautifully wrapped gifts? exceptional meals? the pics I draw of PowerRangers for my 4 yr old?], [and if you took a good photo of each item would the photo count as a 'craft'? thereby making each item count twice?], and by the end of the day we'd decided we could count all manner of things, and so we will.

Starting with these; cupcakes baked, I must confess, by my friend, but individually iced with super fun icing 'pens' by us while (queue confession music....): our children watched a Tintin video in the middle of the afternoon....

So herewith items 1 - 4 on my list of 100 crafts in 2009, only 96 to go!

Anyone care to join the challenge?

In other news, our gas stove has arrived and is installed, our kitchen is in a state of semi-renovation, we are ecstatic little chefs, and to celebrate we're hosting a mini-Christmas lunch (as in We Wish You a Mini-Christmas) for my brother, who missed the real thing this year, and other family members tomorrow. We're doing the works, slightly pared down to make it palatable on a 30 degree day, which is what we're expecting tomorrow.

Mince pie in the pool, anyone?