Monday, December 22, 2008

100 things I dislike intensely

Some time ago I was inspired by hula seventy's list of 100 things in the world I love. So inspired in fact that I totally ripped it off. Since then I've often thought I should revisit that list, I'm sure I was being lazy and I can definitely think of a few other things which should've made it onto my top 100. Maybe one day...

But almost immediately after posting my list of 100 things I love, I started compiling this one in my head. 100 things I dislike intensely ('cos hate is such a strong word). To my credit it hasn't been easy, and it's taken me this long to add to it, a couple of items at a time, but I think I'm there. And maybe I've done some exorcising in the process?

100 things I dislike intensely (in no particular order):

1. toads

2. bigots

3. liquorice

4. mosquitos

5. dog shit

6. price stickers which won't come off completely

7. useless appliances (read: electric egg boilers)

8. people who waste water

9. tom cruise

10. daytime chat shows (read: ricki lake et al)

11. WWF Smackdown

12. exhaust fumes

13. tiny, tiny little 'dogs'

14. rugby

15. flavoured coke

16. badly designed websites

17. cosmopolitan magazine

18. cleaning toilets

19. dead things

20. pmt

21. public toilets

22. toilet paper which rolls the wrong way

23. ratepayer's associations

24. violence

25. tax returns

26. boerepop music

27. running out of time

28. er... running

29. fundamentalists

30. crocs!

31. paper cuts

32. g-strings

33. polony

34. indecisiveness

35. ashtrays

36. non-waterproof mascara

37. call centres

38. any tea except ceylon, or english

39. email petitions

40. quad bikes (SO much - die! die! die!)

41. well-done steak

42. excema

43. blow-drying my hair

44. faxes

45. people with long lists of dislikes

46. tuscan fantasy in parktown

47. rice burners

48. bmw drivers. barring one...

49. people who 'huff' impatiently in queues

50. net curtains

51. root canal (duh)

52. hayfever

53. shower curtains

54. marzipan

55. mullets

56. abused 'quotation' marks

57. insurance claims

58. queue-jumpers

59. white jeans

60. powdered milk

61. polycotton Sheets

62. air ‘fresheners’

63. afro-sceptics

64. tech support

65. being a non-smoker

66. christmas shopping after 1 Dec

67. yellow sports cars

68. hairy backs!

69. hot air hand-dryers

70. shitty nappies

71. hand washing

72. drama queens

73. sports films

74. films about dedicated teachers making a huge difference in inner city schools (yawn)

75. films based on true stories (often extra yawn)

76. throwing up

77. burglar bars

78. sweating

79. nipple piercings

80. tripe

81. hot feet

82. persian cats

83. licking stamps

84. removing, washing & replacing slipcovers

85. people with no sense of humour

86. thursdays ~ I find them really arb

87. duplicity

88. paulo coelho

89. jodi picoult

90. public gyms

91. people who say they 'heart' something. What is that?? (And I'm being a total snob here because I totally accept the mainstream use of 'lol' - I think it's descriptive in a way which didn't exist before, and thereby fills a gap in modern expression - but 'heart' instead of 'love'? No.)

92. paisley

93. people I was never friendly with in high-school trying to befriend me on Facebook

94. kitsch curios

95. family politics

96. not having space for another serving of dessert

97. matching outfits

98. people with no sense of karma

99. cellphone spam

100. big blue-assed flies

3 comments:

julochka said...

totally laughing through all of the snot, tho' i must admit snot would be #1 on my list at the moment. do you think there is a commercial purpose for it, so at least i could make some cash? but, as usual, i digress.

totally with you on 9 tom cruise is so overrated that it's practically criminal. 13. what is up with those? 22. how do people not know which way is the right way, there is ONLY ONE right way. 54. marzipan should be banned.55. have you been to mulletsgalore.com, there are some pretty funny ones there. 58. where are people's manners? 59. should be banned completely. 81. this one made my laugh because husband had me convinced i was the only one. 91. i am SOO with you on this one. it's right up there with people who home school and refer to their children as kidlets....

awesome list! i may have to steal the idea if this cold continues tomorrow and i'm still in the right frame of mind. :-)

Anonymous said...

So I need two clarifications: no 15 and no 30. Hope you're writing about the horrible shoes and not the adorable ones with the teeth. However everything is relative, just check out these crocs:
http://www.unitednude.com/mono-jane-p-857.html?colour=152

Molly said...

Thanks Julie - I love how much we seem to have in common.
Dalai, no. 15 refers to Coca-Cola in flavours such as cherry & vanilla, not cocaine which I heard recently is now available in mint?!
And ja, Crocs should be banned. I'm sure they are Very Comfortable as every Croc-wearer claims in their defense but that doesn't change that they're UGLY with a capital F.
The rubber wedges are hilarious!